An operative from the future tells Wade that he has two options: kill himself before he has a chance to live 2000 years and become Cable's accomplice in dictatorship, or kill Cable. So now, Wade has thirty days to figure out a way to die. Unfortunately, most of his ideas involve convincing Cable to kill him. Fortunately, most of Cable's ideas for stopping him involve sex.

Domino is in a tax-related jam. Wade and Cable get married and neither of them remember it.

Lucky Domino. Unlucky love-sick Cable.

A mutant with the power to make reality as she wills it curses Cable & Deadpool to be stuck together. Literally. Ten feet apart, at all times.

Pining and scatological humor result.